Wife Punishment?

[Deep C]

I can already hear it... "Being married to the Deep is punishment enough..."


But, this is kinda serious if not really irritating... Hasn't happened in quite a while but its back and I'm glowin pretty good about it. She has a good corporate job. Not a ton of money but she shouldn't have a ton of expenses. I handle the big stuff... Mortgage, monster taxes, monster insurance, cell phone, internet access, Iphone, car insurances, property management, dinners out, etc. She covers electric, water, gas and most food...
Well I I got notice that my auto pay for the mortgage came back NSF... I always keep nearly twice what I need in that account to pay all the aforementioned bills. So I go looking... Account dipped into in a big way by missus. Cash deposits she was to make cut into too. She doesn't drink, do drugs, gamble, etc. I look further. Burdines, Macy's, Victoria's Secret, gourmet gift places all around the holidays.
She's a giftaholic. Coworkers, people from her jazzercise class, neighbors, friends, relatives in Africa she hasn't seen or talked to in twenty years. Lawn guys, mail carrier, papergirl... Then Mini gets all she asks for.
Yelling and screaming fall on deaf ears... Have tried talking calmly. She responds "Oh it was just a little here and there." I come back with "No it was a lot, here, there. everywhere." Then I show her the numbers. She's surprised. Just got past her I guess. She has no business in that account at all. She can sign checks because when I'm out of town for months on end some need to be cut.
So what do I do?... It happened years back and creeps up every few years. Some of my tackle show cash would get skimmed or worse calcutta winnings.
I lean on her and the problem stops for a few years then comes back. Almost every cent I make is earmarked for taking care of important stuff especially paying this last mortgage down. The other places are free and clear but the roof over our head should take priority over Mini getting a new Homecomming dress or the missus getting a pedicure or worst of all dumping thousands into gifts to people she barely knows.
Need a permanent solution. No, divorce won't get it. Thats even more expensive. Need this to end once and for all. I'm getting too old for this crap...

[Ravens16]

Deep, are you sure this isn't what it is was really like

[Hallnass282]

My parents got divorced over this shit 3 years ago so I know what your going through.Sit both of them down and scare the shit outta them ... thats the only way I can think of putting it to a stop.I hate to say this because its like bashing my mother but I pushed her to go through counseling over it.Everything is well now but if you dont put a stop to it now you will suffer way worse in the future.

[Deep C]

Like I said ... Its not the first time... Gotta come up with a real fix though otherwise its gonna happen again. Being in dutch with, the big players is not a good thing. This account is tied to my business accounts so transfer is pretty easy but that's neither here or there cause she was skimming the cash deposits too. I draw "X" amount as my paycheck to cover these bills. Drawing from the business accounts to pay personal stuff amounts to increasing personal income and sets up tax and accounting issues. Big enough numbers to hurt. Not life ending stuff but pretty substantial...

Both she and I grew up in pretty comfortable households. I learned early on though that nothing is granted. You are not some how entitled. She missed that lessin I guess... Part of it is her trying to keep up with her sister. Problem there is that she doesn't have mither dear mother over here slinging the cash like her sister in South Africa does...

Have tried the budget thing before and she can't stick to one. Will take from one part to go heavy on the other... Need something real hard core to end this.

[Deep C]

Dave
Its more like this...This is getting old...

[FASTWATER]

I just let my wife pay the bills for six months a few years ago to see what it is really like switch roles for a few month's is what I am getting at it worked and have never had a problem since, although she is headed back to Hawaii and I wasnt invited and she makes way to much money now, they have to relize it is a partnership and what effects 1 effects both!!!PEACE

[Deep C]

On her salary she couldn't swing any more than the mortgage... You saw our place... Classic bit off more than we could chew thing...

[flatbottom]

deep c ..take a second job, dancing at the all male review around the holidays, to help the gal out. You don't have to thanks me...what are friends for don't work the all nighters...you have to charter in the morning

[whitey]

[Deep C]

deep c ..take a second job, dancing at the all male review around the holidays, to help the gal out. You don't have to thanks me...what are friends for don't work the all nighters...you have to charter in the morning

Thats howi met my second and third fiancee's ...
Maybe go solo this time... "Chippendeeps"...