Something i know a lot about...Stripper Fishing

[Big Jay]

There's been a lot of talk on here about everyone's niche and what they know a lot about. Well folks, this is the thread of all threads.

Stripper Fishing 101 by "Big Jay"

Few tips and tricks:

1) Know your strippers:

Working Mom: Generally these strippers are generally older. They have a kid at home to support. You can find these by looking for the c-section scar or stretch marks. These strippers usually want NOTHING to do with the Big Johnson lure you are trolling. They wan't nothing more than your hard earned money to go home and enjoy spending it with their Tom Selic looking boyfriend with a mustache. Like a bluefin tuna motoring to the Canadian Maritimes in Spring, they wont hardly EVER bite.

Russians: Most of these strippers can be identified by

-Trademark Vanilla Smell
-Accent "You Vant Lopdaance?"
-Seen leaving the stripclub in a van that takes them to the nearest city with a bunch of their kind.

These are a 50/50 shot usually. Better look elsewhere.

Newcomers: These are by FAR your best bet. Usually between the ages of 18-22. Stripping to them is a novelty. Like a curious Mahi on a Lobster Pot Buoy, they thing every bit of attention they get is a novelty. For them the whole newness of having countless men drooling over them means sex.

Techniques:

"Let her eat"

Another thing i have found when fishing for strippers is not to over bait them. Where at all possible DO NOT feed them endless amounts of money for a lapdance. That's what they want and most likely as soon as you do that they lump you into the "customer" category. AKA: You ain't gettin none.

"Tease her up"

Strippers love when you treat them like shit. Most likely every guy who comes in fauns over them and treats them better than they do their wife. Your job...show them as little respect as possible. Put their dollars on the wet bar matt, make jokes about them, act all arrogant and stuck up. They'll love you more. "Oh my god, this guy doesn't like me? I'll show him!" Bingo...the set up.

"Bait and Switch"

Look through your nearest ATM garbage can. Find a receipt that has an account balance of $10,000 or more listed. $15,000 preferably. Go to your local stripclub. Find your nearest newcomer. She'll ask you for a lapdance. First refuse, then bashfully accept. Buy no more than $20 worth. At the end say "Listen, i normally don't do this. I was in town and met up with some friends. Anyway, i would like to see you again" Write your name and number on the back of the receipt and hand it to her say "Call me sometime". Hang on for the ride

Believe me, i am from NJ. I have a lot of experience with stripper fishing. I'll have to post pics of some of my trophy catches

[Big Jay]

Oh and always, i repeat, ALWAYS protect your lure.

[cravertosu]

SPOT ON!!! I like it!!

Slavic newcomers are my favorite!!

And yes, ALWAYS protect your lure....the burning sensation is a bad thing.

My roommate and I hooked up with stripper twins a couple years back....THAT was a good couple of months!!

[Big Jay]

SPOT ON!!! I like it!!

Slavic newcomers are my favorite!!

And yes, ALWAYS protect your lure....the burning sensation is a bad thing.

Nothing worse than losing a perfectly good lure to a badass stripper. Kinda takes ya out of the game.

[cravertosu]

Nothing worse than losing a perfectly good lure to a badass stripper. Kinda takes ya out of the game.

YOU LOST YOUR LURE?!!

[homewrecker]

lol good stuf...ha ha

[Big Jay]

YOU LOST YOUR LURE?!!

NO! My lure is still trolling strong. Thank god nothing has put any teeth marks in it

[teddyp]

F-ing hilarious.

[Big Jay]

I am doing a Stripper Fishingt Tournament for SFC.com. Who's in?

Calcutta's for Fattest Stripper, One with Least Teeth, Hottest Stripper, Most Strippers Released

[finegrade]

Big Jay

Would you classify strippers as bottom feeders?