In need of advice?

[SportFishStaff]

I have a nine year old daughter, one of the sweetest kids you ever want to meet. Literally not a bad bone in her entire body. At school she has been complemented on her guardianship of the kids with disability. Always polite and well mannered really makes her parents proud. We get emails from teachers and have had people come up to us to complement us on what a good kid she is.

She is very tall for her age and solid. One thing we have been trying to get her to stop doing is being goofy and flighty, she is not very athletic but tries her hardest.

Because she tends to be sweet, and has a tendency to be emotional the bullies have started to pick on her. I have begged her to stand up for her self, look the kid in the eye and tell her you don't want any problems with me and stare her in the face until she turns away.

I think its getting to the point were i tell her to kick the living crap out of this little ****. But I know if she gets suspended for a week it will crush her. This day and age with this zero tolerance crap, scuffles and kid fights are blown out of proportion.

So theirs my dilemma
Thanks Tim

I wont have this problem with the 6yr old as I may have the opposite problem she don't take a lot of crap.

[bigfish4me]

I have a nine year old daughter, one of the sweetest kids you ever want to meet. Literally not a bad bone in her entire body. At school she has been complemented on her guardianship of the kids with disability. Always polite and well mannered really makes her parents proud. We get emails from teachers and have had people come up to us to complement us on what a good kid she is.

She is very tall for her age and solid. One thing we have been trying to get her to stop doing is being goofy and flighty, she is not very athletic but tries her hardest.

Because she tends to be sweet, and has a tendency to be emotional the bullies have started to pick on her. I have begged her to stand up for her self, look the kid in the eye and tell her you don't want any problems with me and stare her in the face until she turns away.

I think its getting to the point were i tell her to kick the living crap out of this little ****. But I know if she gets suspended for a week it will crush her. This day and age with this zero tolerance crap, scuffles and kid fights are blown out of proportion.

So theirs my dilemma
Thanks Tim

I wont have this problem with the 6yr old as I may have the opposite problem she don't take a lot of crap.

Its a different world....how about it, being a father of 14 and 12 year old girls......lets talk about some drama lol....When I was 14 ....3 guys whupped the sh!t out of me, I went home with a black eye, bloody nose and a fat lip.....my Old man....took me to each one of their houses and I went 2 for 3 one one one......third match was a draw and we are still best friends to this day lol.......its not like that today, girls are just as much if not more viscous than we ever were.......and we thought it was rough when we were teen age-rs......teach them to stand up for themselves and you will teach them a valuable lesson on life

[SportFishStaff]

Its a different world....how about it, being a father of 14 and 12 year old girls......lets talk about some drama lol....When I was 14 ....3 guys whupped the sh!t out of me, I went home with a black eye, bloody nose and a fat lip.....my Old man....took me to each one of their houses and I went 2 for 3 one one one......third match was a draw and we are still best friends to this day lol.......its not like that today, girls are just as much if not more viscous than we ever were.......and we thought it was rough when we were teen age-rs......teach them to stand up for themselves and you will teach them a valuable lesson on life

Ain't that the truth, now a days you need a lawyer on retainer in case your kid gets into a scuffle

My Mom and Dad always taught me to not start crap but if it came my way to finish it. Thats about where I'm at. I taught my girls how to throw a punch and where to strike to make it as short of a fight as possible.

The Drama with girls is brutal

[hubris 1]

I think the best thing you can teach girls is...........No matter what, someday you will grow into a young lady. You will look back on this and be glad you were the woman that you were. There is nothing pretty about seeing girls physically fight.
I know. My youngest sister was an awkward 6 ft girl in 12th grade. She got teased, and teased. She finally punched the girl and knocked her down with one punch. She was so afraid what my dad would say. She got suspended for 3 days. The principal called the house. I think it was the first time in my life I heard my dad tell the Principal to go F himself. I never heard that word from my dad before. My sister was a good person, my dad stood beside her and told her, F them. Bunch of liberal troublemakers. I hope you cut her lip. He took Colleen to lunch 3 days in a row.
Today, my sister is a beautiful girl, all 6 ft of her. She has 5 boys, all gentleman. My friends see her and say, "thats your sister?" Yea, were all good looking.
My advice tim, She will learn more in the long run walking away. Today, they will make your girl out to be the trouble maker. Its hard to be a parent. I say to you what Gwyneth Paltrow told the detective...."May your child be well"

[worldcat lemon]

My daughter is 21 and she don't take no crap from anyone and she has never been bullied.

What you might do is take your daughter over to the girls house, sit down with the parents and have a brutally honest conversation with the parents and the kid. The parents of the bully needs to know that if the bully doesn't back off that your daughter will be forced to protect herself.

I get sick of these politically correct school administrators that won't put a stop to this kind of crap. I know from moving over 36 times in 16 years as a kid that every new school had at least one bully, and as the new kid I knew what I had to do to be left alone.

If your daughter is well known to be a good kid, she may get a suspension for clocking the bully, but it is sometimes what a bully needs to put a stop to it, is to get the crap pounded out of them.

It is too bad we have to be afraid to protect ourselves, because that gives the advantage to the bully.

[Marlin Mama]

The problem is not only will you have to worry about being suspended from school, but depending on whatever action was taken to defend herself, she might also face a lawsuit. I have a cousin in her 20's that was in a bar & provoked by another woman. When she pushed her away, she was sued by this woman (who's father is an attorney). The police showed up at her door to arrest her for assault! She ended up with over $10,000 in attorney's fees just to defend herself and ended up paying off the original attacker. This woman used this scam to make money!

[teddyp]

My daughter is 21 and she don't take no crap from anyone and she has never been bullied.

What you might do is take your daughter over to the girls house, sit down with the parents and have a brutally honest conversation with the parents and the kid. The parents of the bully needs to know that if the bully doesn't back off that your daughter will be forced to protect herself.

I get sick of these politically correct school administrators that won't put a stop to this kind of crap. I know from moving over 36 times in 16 years as a kid that every new school had at least one bully, and as the new kid I knew what I had to do to be left alone.

If your daughter is well known to be a good kid, she may get a suspension for clocking the bully, but it is sometimes what a bully needs to put a stop to it, is to get the crap pounded out of them.

It is too bad we have to be afraid to protect ourselves, because that gives the advantage to the bully.

Your daughter is probably the bully and definitely single for a reason. Try teaching her manors and how to be a lady. It will help her in the long run.

[LuckyLady]

That's a tough one Tim for sure. I don't think there is any right answer here.

I am not totally sure what and why they are picking on her figuring that part out would help.

Ignoring the bully would be the proper thing to do. Eventually the bully will get bored and move on to the next kid.

If she is getting picked on for not being the "cool" kid, then she needs to one up on the bully. Get your daughter something that every kid would want, that will make the bully and other kids jealous.

The other thing you can do is have an awesome party for her, a little bit extravagant, invite the cool kids, and the bully too. You too can be the "cool" parents of the cool girl...

Knowing what and why they are picking on her would help.

Fighting is definitely not the answer, going to the parents house of the bully will only make it worse, they will only pick on her harder

Good luck with her! I am so glad I don't have kids nor do I intend. It's a tough cruel world for kids these days and I certainly would not want to grow up in it or have kids grow through it

[SportFishStaff]

Thank You Gang I appreciate it.

My daughters is sensitive and I think that is one reason this kid is picking on her. The more she lets it bother her the more the bully picks on her. I'm going to let my girl be who she is, I told her to just walk away and say whatever and ignore it. My girl has an awesome group of kids she hangs out with so its not an issue of her being a loner.

She does know that if this kid ever puts her hands on her to kick the living crap out of her. She can throw a punch thats for sure.

In this day and age fighting is not what it was 25yrs ago. Going to the parents is not in the cards as from what i've heard the two older sisters were the exact same way going through the school system. The situation will be monitored
Thanks again for all of your input.

[lowtide]

Have you considered in hiring a black girl maybe in her class to maybe hang around with her ? kind of like "My Body Guard ". Black girls 10x out of 10 have a pissed off attitude and take no sh!t from anyone, mm mmm mmmm mmm mm ...... Or maybe have your daughter atleast get a blood transfusion from a black girl ?? Although, she may inherit that black girl attitude, which is good but you may then have the problem of her stealing pocket books. Tough call - either way good luck.