If You're Going to Talk to a Republican You'd Best Have a Republican Dictionary...

[longfisher]

Talking to a Republican can be frustrating. Often, it seems like they are speaking an entirely different language -- and in many cases, they are! For this reason, in the hopes of facilitating cross-party dialogue and mutual understanding, I have compiled what I believe to be the first comprehensive Republican-to-English dictionary, featuring words commonly used by Republicans, and their English translations, alphabetized for your convenience:

America (United States of): A country located in the N. Western Hemisphere that is #1.
Bible: A sacred text that provides incontestable answers when thumped.
Birth Certificate: An official birth record required of all US Presidents, regardless of race, since 2008.
Capitalism: A system of economic organization that has never been attempted.
Christmas: A holiday commemorating the birth of Jesus Christ, now rarely celebrated due to persecution by atheists.
Compromise: (uncommon) A form of political suicide.
Coast (East): A very bad coast of the continental United States.
Coast (West): Another really inexcusable coast.
Communism: The belief that the government should ever do anything.
Condescending: Accurately informed.
Constitution (U.S.): The hallowed founding document of the United States, the text of which must be interpreted strictly and amended immediately.
Corporations: Large people who are overtaxed.
Deficits: 1) Fiscal shortfalls incurred by Democrats that threaten to bankrupt the country. 2) Fiscal shortfalls incurred by Republicans that don't matter.
Democrat: A political party.
Election: A method of selecting representatives, the fraudulence of which may be determined by the outcome.
Elitist: Qualified.
Endangered Species: Animals that have it coming.
Evolution: A theory of human origins that is out there.
Extremist (Liberal): Espousing or adhering to political beliefs that are held by only a majority of Americans.
Fact: Information that has been verifiably posted to a RedState comment board.
Forest (National): Trees that have it coming.
Gut: Region of the body from which decisions should be made.
Homosexuality: A membership-only lifestyle organization that perpetuates itself through youth recruitment.
Hitler: A man to whom it would be inappropriate to compare President Obama in spite of the many uncanny similarities.
Jesus: Charismatic religious leader and son of God; born in Bethlehem in the year 0; beliefs include love, charity, enhanced interrogation, privatized healthcare, elimination of the estate tax, and the right to carry concealed semiautomatic weapons.
League (Ivy): an association of eight Eastern universities and colleges, the lack of a fancy education from which qualifies a candidate for political office.
Liberal: A person who should be rounded up and shot but not really.
Marxism: A political and economic philosophy developed by Karl Marx and promulgated by Paul Krugman.
Media (Mainstream): Where you won't hear things.
Medicare: A fraudulent, socialistic boondoggle that is sacrosanct.
Mexicans: Brown people who have it coming.
Mountaintops: Ancient rock formations that have it coming.
Muslims: Brown people who have it coming.
News: Fox News
Obamacare: A Federally-mandated policy to address the national oversupply of grandparents through euthanasia.
Organic: Eaten by lesbians.
Party (Tea): A grass-roots movement of patriotic Americans fighting for the principle of "No Taxation With Representation."
Poll: A survey used to determine, to within a margin of error, what percentage of Americans are right.
Poverty: The condition of having inadequate financial or material resources due to not trying hard enough.
Propaganda: The politically motivated dissemination of biased information, opinion, or data through its publication in the New York Times.
Punishment (Capital): The legally authorized killing by the State of someone who is definitely guilty.
Racism: A form of discrimination that typically happens in reverse.
Regulation: Rules issued by a government agency for no reason.
Ronald Reagan: A fictional character based loosely on President Ronald Reagan.
Scientist: A person who employs a rigorous system of observation, experiment, measurement, and verification to perpetuate his Godless left-wing agenda.
Social Security: A redistributionist Ponzi scheme that is sacrosanct.
Socialism: An economic system invented by FDR.
Taxes: Levies imposed by the government that raise more revenue the lower they are.
Torture: A method of interrogation that does not rise to the level of torture.
Terrorist: A person to whom a person who threatens to destroy the U.S. economy unless his demands are met should not be compared.
Unbiased: Giving equal weight to both sides of the looking glass.
Wealthy (the): People who earned every penny.
Up: A direction which, depending on circumstances, is down.
Warming (Global): An anomalous, anthropogenic increase in the earth's atmospheric and oceanic temperatures that isn't happening.
Welfare: A government program to distribute Cadillacs to unwed mothers.
Yes: (no translation available)

[Robja]

Longfisher

you left out one word...............

I love this word . Finally, a word recently coined to describe our current political situation; a way to describe Obama and his voters.



INEPTOCRACY (in-ep-toc’-ra-cy) - a system of government where the least capable to lead are elected by the least capable of producing, and where the members of society least likely to sustain themselves or succeed, are rewarded with goods and services paid for by the confiscated wealth of a diminishing number of producers.

[longfisher]

Longfisher

you left out one word...............

I love this word . Finally, a word recently coined to describe our current political situation; a way to describe Obama and his voters.



INEPTOCRACY (in-ep-toc’-ra-cy) - a system of government where the least capable to lead are elected by the least capable of producing, and where the members of society least likely to sustain themselves or succeed, are rewarded with goods and services paid for by the confiscated wealth of a diminishing number of producers.

Yep, let's have some fun now, guys. I love this site because often, like this case, I don't have to argue much to make my point as clear as crystal. I just have to wait for a few replies to do it for me.

You see, the original post in this thread is intended to illustrate in a comedic way that Republican ideas are extreme, that they don't accept any dissent about them and that this extremism extends even to their vernacular (words).

Then Robja, apparently innocent of the intent of the original post, posts a new word definition the nature of which PRECISELY EXEMPLIFIES THE EXTREME INTOLERANT VIEWS OF REPULBICANS THAT THE ORIGINAL POST WAS INTENDED TO ILLUSTRATE.

Robja, your post reminds me of the debate we had here on stoning and most of you said that I was up a creek without a paddle to say that such things were also advocated in the U.S. Then, of course, Jay W chimed in and said that his Xmastian fellows agreed with me and that stoning was a satisfactory punishment for crimes such as homosexuality, misbehavin' teenagers and those who wear their pants too low...BECAUSE THE BIBLE (see definition above) SAYS SO.

Man, this board is a goldmine of idiots. Robja, I want to thank you for making my point for me.

LF

[scattered_grass]

Longfisher

you left out one word...............

I love this word . Finally, a word recently coined to describe our current political situation; a way to describe Obama and his voters.



INEPTOCRACY (in-ep-toc’-ra-cy) - a system of government where the least capable to lead are elected by the least capable of producing, and where the members of society least likely to sustain themselves or succeed, are rewarded with goods and services paid for by the confiscated wealth of a diminishing number of producers.

perfect.

[seapower]

Slam dunk there old boy! Sound's to me like you live and work in the real world, other's are still waiting on the next comet!!! I guess LongFisher is singing the praise's of the crowd we have "in" now, if not it sure sound's like it! Yes sir, He's got his finger's on the pulse alright! Frank

[Avenger]

Man, this board is a goldmine of idiots. Robja, I want to thank you for making my point for me.

LF

Watsamatter longfisher? Your "dumb" kid beat you at marbles again so you had to come over here to make yourself feel superior?

That was actually kind of funny, but like many of your threads you obviously you didn't write that yourself. Do you have a C&P of a Democrat Dictionary to prove your "independent" thinking? Or are you just trolling for entertainment?

[longfisher]

Watsamatter longfisher? Your "dumb" kid beat you at marbles again so you had to come over here to make yourself feel superior?

That was actually kind of funny, but like many of your threads you obviously you didn't write that yourself. Do you have a C&P of a Democrat Dictionary to prove your "independent" thinking? Or are you just trolling for entertainment?

Just entertainment, A.

LF

[Robja]

[You see, the original post in this thread is intended to illustrate in a comedic way that Republican ideas are extreme, that they don't accept any dissent about them and that this extremism extends even to their vernacular (words). Then Robja, apparently innocent of the intent of the original post, posts a new definition which PRECISELY MATCHES THE EXTREME AND INTOLERANT VIEWS THE ORIGINAL POST WAS INTENDED TO ILLUSTRATE.

LF you need to take your blinders off. It is not only republicans but both parties. As an unaffiliated voter I vote person not party. The Democrats are just as extreme. Open your eyes and you can see they are both extreme and it just depends where your preferences lie.

Robja, your post reminds me of the debate we had here on stoning and most of you said that I was up a creek without a paddle to say that such things were also advocated in the U.S. Then, of course, Jay W chimed in and said that his Xmastian fellows agreed with me and that stoning was a satisfactory punishment for crimes such as homosexuality, misbehavin' teenagers and those who wear their pants too low.

Man, this board is a goldmine of idiots. Robja, I want to thank you for making my point for me.

[COLOR="#FF0000"]and by the way this site is not a gold mine of idiots. It is a site with those that have their own opinions. Just because their opinions don't agree with yours does not make them idiots. [C0LOR]

LF[/QUOTE]

[scattered_grass]

Yep, let's have some fun now, guys. I love this site because often, like this case, I don't have to argue much to make my point as clear as crystal. I just have to wait for a few replies to do it for me.

You see, the original post in this thread is intended to illustrate in a comedic way that Republican ideas are extreme, that they don't accept any dissent about them and that this extremism extends even to their vernacular (words). Then Robja, apparently innocent of the intent of the original post, posts a new definition which PRECISELY MATCHES THE EXTREME AND INTOLERANT VIEWS THE ORIGINAL POST WAS INTENDED TO ILLUSTRATE.

Robja, your post reminds me of the debate we had here on stoning and most of you said that I was up a creek without a paddle to say that such things were also advocated in the U.S. Then, of course, Jay W chimed in and said that his Xmastian fellows agreed with me and that stoning was a satisfactory punishment for crimes such as homosexuality, misbehavin' teenagers and those who wear their pants too low.

Man, this board is a goldmine of idiots. Robja, I want to thank you for making my point for me.

LF

put down the crack pipe...

[longfisher]

LF you need to take your blinders off. It is not only republicans but both parties. As an unaffiliated voter I vote person not party. The Democrats are just as extreme. Open your eyes and you can see they are both extreme and it just depends where your preferences lie.

I'm not a fan of the Democrats. Never said I was. Do try to remember, I'm a dissaffected Republican (couldn't stand the damned meanness that's developed in the party in the last two decades) and for now don't vote for either major party out of principle.

But I do have a preference about whom I pick on. The Repulbicans are much more fun to poke fun at than the Democrats or any other party that may have ever been.

Why? It's because you're so sanctimonious, overly sure of yourselves and your positions (as the dictionary humorously points out), condemnatory, punitively contemptuous of others less fortunate than you (see Robja's post for a perfect example of the contempt and character assassination you cling to), utterly selfish, information and fact-deprived, innocent of logic and reason, imbued with a near-fascist mentality of corporatism, have a missplaced and wholly unjustified sense of self-importance in this society to the point that you seem to believe you're an indispensible asset to the country and, lastly, you seem to think that you're the defenders of all things right, good and patriotic about this country. You do so to the point that you appear to believe that you're the final arbitors of who's an American and who's not, of who's worthy of the protections of the Constitution and who's not and even who should live here and who should go.

It's your loud, undeservedly proud and under-endowed nature that makes you such great targets of all things comedic. You're great targets because you've given up a any pretext of citizen-like propriety and, laden with your wholly false but self-serving ideology, you have become mere caricatures of citizens.

And, I'm just simply loving pointing it out to you because your knee-jerk responses can be relied upon to affirm quickly my dark assessment of you, as is the case with this thread.

Were I to do the same thing to Democrats I'm sure it'd send them lurching and stumbling down the street to the nearest Jewish shrink to help them with their introspection. It'd be cruel and undeservedly so.

Republicans are the ones who abundantly deserve it as you seem sincerely proud of your incredibly deep flaws as citizens.

LF