Oh yeah its that wonderful time of year... Deep Cheap has been shopping all season long and knows when to strike ... Its panic time at the stores... "We gotta move this shit or eat it". Deep takes aim and one by one snipers away ate ech item with Deep dish discount precision...
Each stop in the rolling tackle box is an adventure. The condensation from the AC has built up and started short circuiting the electrical systems. The door ajar system kicks in though the car is sealed like an egyptian tomb. The lights go on and off and the the ding ding ding of the door open buzzer is incessant. Deep doesn't care hes on a mission...
Back on the road he enjoys south Floridas mix of drivers. Some people say that its old people that live in Florida... I beg to differ... Its their parents! So in the slow flowing stream of SoFla Deep dodges those of Gods Waiting Room. He doesn't curse them though. He's smart enough that one day it too will be him. The ones he does share hand signals with are the young impetuous ones who blow stop lights, pass on the wrong side , sometimes up on the side walks ... Yes it is those who get the "number one" salute from the Deepster.
The tackle box fills with bargains. He has ignored every clue about what his loved ones want and made Deep decisions of his own... He knows that they will love what ever he brings. As long as he's wearing his holster loaded with a shiny topsider they always do.
Finally a stop for two half gallons of egg nog has him pointed toward the Castle Deep. By the time he hits the driveway one of the half gallons has been consumed and he feels right. To the wrapping room he goes. 47 Christmases have come and gone and still he has no clue how to wrap presents properly. "Doesn't matter he chuckles... They'll tear into the packaging like vultures into carion any way."
Tape and paper fly through the air as the local Christmas Music station plays its full six song library of music with every other one being that putrid Feliz Navidad song...
Using his bait knife, he trims the last package and kicks on the Jimmy Buffet Christmas CD. As he cleans up the wrapping paper rolls he spies Meow Meow the teaser eating flabby tabby sleeping in amongst the presents under the tree... He gets a bright idea.... He tip toes up with one of the rolls. He purses his lips, sets the one end inches from the sleeping feline, and lets a low "C" rip. Ok maybe a "F" minor... It doesn't matter. It has worked. The kitty catches sky. Hang time is good but the pay back is a bitch. Meow does a 180 mid air and hits the ground running across the mantle. Mrs Deep's vase full of flowers and snow man figurines shouldn't have been there any way.
The cat ricochets off the dining room table and skidding on the waxy surface takes out the stack of silverware and napkins ready to be set. Deep chugs more egg nog and watches. The cat climbs the book case and drops A-L of the encylopedia on the floor... Deep goes to check posts on SFC and can hear shit breaking all over the house. Each new breakage panicing the furry one even more.
Missus Deep enters the picture and sees the wrecked house. "What the #%@& is this mess..." "Hi Honey, Meow is just full of the Christmas spirit I guess."
Mini announces her arrival by running her bicylce into the garage door. "Hi Dad! Gotta go!" Friends are waiting... In a blur shes in and out. Steaks at the Outback sounds like a plan...
For now... Thats the story from Castle Deep...
Last edited by Deep C; 12-21-2006 at 05:48 PM.
well deep, sounds like a fun day, first, you know who can handle that rolling tackle box, and leave those mambas in their when ya trade it in I will swap you driving on your highways, to driving around king of prussia mall. Compared to those people a shotgun start at the seabuoy looks like a military parade. Im with ya on the Jimmy Buffet cd, crank it up.
a couple of hints on the wrapping, duct tape, duct tape, and more duct tape. It fixes everything,and if that doesn't happen to work, a can of spray adhesive will.
Last edited by gradywhite273; 12-21-2006 at 06:13 PM.
technical difficulties , refer below.
Last edited by gradywhite273; 12-21-2006 at 06:22 PM.
shhh deep, i will tell you , the double sided carpet tape. that stuff can hold riggers on boats it the same stuff flat used in his sheep picture.
No No! Say its isn't so! I always used duct tape rolled on itself!
I will say that my wrapping skills have come a long way. When I brought meow meow home as a gift I used a staple gun!
you shoud be proud deep, though staplegun , i would have though rigging wire.
Nope the wire is reserved for house hold projects like legs on chairs and hanging ceiling fans... Come to think of it I think the Rolling Tackle box is about 10% wire at this stage...
good that way when i take it as a trade, i can get the mambas and the rigging wire, coool. I hope you used monel.
You gotta find me a gold mini van or suv that will serve as the new RTB first...
I'm dead set on gold/ champagne...