Southern Dinner Coming Together

[Mike Boehler]

Our Christmas Eve "southern" dinner is arriving at the house a piece at a time. I can't believe I have to wait 22 days to tear into this country ham.

figures, the country ham shows up in a box with no directions. Didn't they look at the shipping label and see I'm from NY

[ReelCommotion]

How did it turn out?

[Mike Boehler]

How did it turn out?

Glad you asked!
Everything was just like we expected, except for the country ham (another story entirely).

the day before christmas eve, me and my brother smoke cooked some pulled pork, 10 hours and a case of Labatts later and we were all cooked.

The whole "southern" theme worked out great, as we ate a lot of food we had never eaten before and we loved it. It was a blast (except for the country ham!)

I got some pics somewhere, see if I can find them.

Thanks to everyone for the help making it authentic.

Mike

[Robja]

I can't wait to hear the story on the country ham. It did not look like a smithfield ham. You did not try to bake it did you?

[Mike Boehler]

I can't wait to hear the story on the country ham. It did not look like a smithfield ham. You did not try to bake it did you?

Well, the wife decided to reinvent the wheel. She bought a Newsomes Country Ham from Kentucky. Supposed to be better than smithfield. They shipped it without cooking it. They suggested that. My house turned into a fat rendering plant on christmas eve.

Don't really know how that's supposed to go, but I've had Smithfields already cooked and they are spectacular, this was anything but. I sent a PM to Glenn so see what we did wrong. We did cook it as per their directions and I coulnd't take the smell! I had to put it outside because of the stench!

[Robja]

Well, the wife decided to reinvent the wheel. She bought a Newsomes Country Ham from Kentucky. Supposed to be better than smithfield. They shipped it without cooking it. They suggested that. My house turned into a fat rendering plant on christmas eve.

Don't really know how that's supposed to go, but I've had Smithfields already cooked and they are spectacular, this was anything but. I sent a PM to Glenn so see what we did wrong. We did cook it as per their directions and I coulnd't take the smell! I had to put it outside because of the stench!

Glenn knows ham so he will probably tell you you bought the wrong one. You sure it wasn't the collard greens that smelled up the house?

[Mike Boehler]

Glenn knows ham so he will probably tell you you bought the wrong one. You sure it wasn't the collard greens that smelled up the house?

Nope, not the collard greens. We had to simmer the ham for about 6 hours in a big pot, then cool it off and then take the skin and about 1/2" of fat off the whole thing, then glaze and bake for 45 minutes.

The simmering was brutal. Smelled like we were killing shit in the kitchen and boiling it up for dinner.

It looked perfect when we were done, but couldn't get that smell out of it..

[SAXIS ISLANDER]

Glad it worked out for y'all.

[Glenn W]

They make this Whiskey named Virginia Gentleman--- nastiest swill you ever tasted--- smooth as 80 grit sandpaper. For Bourbon I buy Kentucky, for hams I buy Virginian (a Tarheel ham is not half bad though).
There are 2 options we have here:

OPTION 1:
I can guarantee I know what happened (in part) to your hillbilly ham. First, in your PM you indicated that you unwrapped Daniel Boone's lost Bear hindquarter and simmered it for 6 hours or so---- you did not mentioned that you soaked it overnight in the sink---- I hope you soaked it overnight or a salt block would have less sodium.
Anyway, I can be almost sure that the burnt fat smell is from the following: I bet you put the skin side down and joint side up. Then, I bet you had the heat on a bit too high and the pork rind (pig's skin) burnt to the bottom of your roasting pan when "simmering". The Skin side goes up and when we say simmer, we mean, barely a simmer--- no boiling and don't lift the damn lid off the roasting pan--- your ham is still there even if you don't keep peeking in on it. With the skin side up, all the wonderful smoked lard melts into the meat while simmering, keeping it moist and juicy.
I have seen a few come in my kitchen while cooking a ham and not really care for the smell (all were from north of 39 degrees), but it is such a fond aroma to us--- However, I have burnt a ham skin before and it does smell to holy hell.
All this glazing in the oven shit--- well, it is kinda pretty I'll admit that, but country hams ain't made for baking--- you bake bisquits, boil collards, and simmer ham. If you must do the glazing fu fu, try it the proper way-- After it's finished cooking on TOP of the stove, trim the skin and fat and leave 1/4" ( no more, no less) fat on the ham. Score your cute little diamonds through the thin layer of fat and just nick into the meat a tad. Put you cloves in as you see fit and mix up a thick paste of of Brown sugar, moistened w/ Tangerine or Orange juice, and a little maple syrup if you like ( it needs to be a thick paste). Put your little pinapple rings on the ham and smother with the glaze paste. Put oven on 475 for a couple minutes , then low broil for about 2 more minutes and you are done.
Now, throw all that shit away on top of the ham and put in the frig for several hours to cool ( much easier to slice thin when the meat is cold)
Finally, do not over cook your ham as it will be hard as a rock after it it cooled.

OPTION 2:
Get some cabbage, potatoes and a corned beef brisket:---- have at it--- bake or boil the sombich till your heart's content and savor the aroma of Ireland.

Next time you get on a Southern theme kick, send me a PM. I'll be happy to go buy you a real ham--- hell, I'll even cook it for you and Fed X it to your doorstep at cost.

[Mike Boehler]

Thanks guys,

We did soak overnight, scrub with a brush the next morning. But I have another theory, They told us to let it cool between cooking it and putting it in the oven, this part I know we screwed up! We should have cooked it the day before, because we couldn't get it cooled off and we ended up putting it in the oven while still warm from the simmering. We could have cooked it days before and didn't know it.

We didn't really glaze it much, just some watery brown stuff (not sure what).

But.. I think if we cooked days earlier and cooled it off and put it aside, that fat stench would have worked itself out.