I see the clueless threads all over the site. I enjoy them but do they really get to the true meaning of "Clueless"? I think not. However these buggers represent "Clueless" to a tee.
Now I'm Deep C, Deep for short... I kill shit for a living. Its nothing new. Its well publicised, documented and even videoed in a few cases... Call it a recessive gene sdating back to my neanderthal forfathers. If I can't F*** it I want to kill it...
So then tell me what the hell these beasts of hell are thinking? IT starts with one sneaking past the front door of castle deep north... A short cut? I could see maybe trying to slip one past but that big blue rolling tackle box in the driveway should give her a clue that I'm in residence...
But nooooooooo. She ignores that and decides MY BUSHES taste dandy...
Now just a minute there! Those are my bushes! No I have a potential cooler full of backstraps, burgers, and sausages just chowing down on them? Oh it gets worse... She invites her sister who evidently is some kind of deer whore cause she's toting three fresh bambies along for the munch fest... Dropped three this year? She must be doing some serious time on her back or however they do it...
Then to really piss me off she invites three swinging dicks over to make sure my castle is denuded of any vegitation whatsoever... Take note we have a couple gene pools at work here. We have one pool that has some really big animals in it as evidenced by this spike who towers over the two six point bush eatin sons of bitches. Then theres a second pool that boasts good horns as evidenced by the dink with the rack in the back. There is a third geen pool where both bodies and racks are impressive but they didn't show for the chow down at Deep C Diner today...
Yes folks Clue friggin less!!! I know the rules and doin time aint my bag. Not sure how rough a Rumson chain gang would be or not. Not itchin to find out but God Damnit those are my bushes and the perps are made out of meat...
TENAFLY, N.J. (WPIX) - A wild turkey is taking charge and running amok on a block in a northern New Jersey neighborhood, residents say.
The terrorizing turkey is apparently bullying the residents of Hillside Avenue in Tenafly, where neighbors claim that it has chased them down the street, pecked at the tires of a postal service truck, and even has engaged in standoffs with cars attempting to pull out of driveways.
Resident Gary Zamchick said one encounter with the 4-foot tall bird left him fleeing for his life.
"I was attempting to put a garage sale sign up on the spot where the turkey was standing," Zamchick said, recounting his meeting with the turkey to PIX News. "He then started walking toward me and then he started chasing me. I ran as fast as I could back to my house."
Later in the day, Zamchick got in his car, drove to the same spot and successfully posted his garage sale sign.
According to residents, the first time anyone ever heard about the wild turkey in town was when the animal had a run-in with the neighborhood mailman.
A couple of weeks ago, Zamchick said he was approached by the visibly upset mailman who launched into his story, claiming the turkey chased him down Hillside Avenue, and prevented him from delivering mail. The mail carrier told residents, the bird also targeted his postage truck by pecking at its tires.
A number of neighbors have experienced similar encounters with the animal, but none of them ended in injuries.
"We see raccoons, some skunks and sometimes opossums but it is unusual to have such a very large bird on our block," Zamchick said. "I actually love the fact the turkey is on our block, I'm not concerned about it at all."
My ass... they're bush eatin walking meatsicles...
Gotta come up with a way to drop one without lots of noise or big ling blood trails leading back to my garage... Maybe bow one up on a fifty wide using an ear of corn... Wonder what leader and hook I should use?
"If at first you don't succeed, don't try skydiving"
Join Date
May 2007
Location
Richmond Va
Posts
120
Best Catch
152# YFT
Your on the right track with the corn next you need some rope or cable and make a big assed snare and let them swing by the neck for a little while. If they are tame enough to eat out of the hand which might take only a couple of weeks then a billy club in the other hand will work well too, but it leaves a little more mess. They sure do look delicious standing there. Mmmmmmmmnnnnn fried backstrap.
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Wild Turkey Terrorizes NJ Neighborhood (July 22, 2009) 
