The Adventures of ARNOLD.... the PIG

[Ace1st]

Boys....... last fall, dad and I were scouting an area for a SQUEEELER hunt when we walked up on a SOW with a half dozen little demons at her side. They werent big as your fist and MAMA took out like a streak and left town with most at her heals. Dad hollerd for me to grab one and off I went.

Now... I know, I dont look like much boys, but my college footballl days taught me to be quick for a few yards anyway. I ran down one little squeeeler and as he realized I was on em, he opted for the low road and detoured into a overblown stump. Great for me, I was tired anyway and ready to give up! Luckily, the little one never squeeled while in the stump, so mama never came back looking for it. WHEW! Then I dug him out and put him in my coat pocket at which time I headed for the Polaris Ranger double time hoping the SOW would not now hear his crying. Fortunately she had either put some distance between them or just didnt care about losing just one.

Mean little booger too, he latched on to my pocket like a bulldog and I had to pry him off the fabric to get him out of the pocket. After getting him to the farm, i realized he was a Boar and figured we would make him an it with a sharp knife once he got a little bigger. Well, that never happened!

Its been 9 months since his arrival and he has tore out of that pen so many times I quit putting him back in it. Which which became another problem, little did I know that ARNOLD was visiting the New Housing Developement next door each night. That little corn eating BOOGER would head to the neighbors yard each night rooting up all the flower gardens. He especially had a THING for Camelias! He had even terrorized the local poodles and other development pets! Little did they know, ARNOLD thought he was a dog anyway. he wasnt trying to hurt any of their "babies".

UUUUH OOOOH!! Houston , we have a problem!! Well, needless to say I sure didnt claim him!! After hearing about the HOA meeting and all the complaints of wild pigs destroying the neighborhood, I figured heres an opportunity! Nothing but good can become of this! I offered my services to rid the area of the demon. You know, the Great PIG Slayer that I am and all. At which time I simply called him to his pen and strenghtened it up a bit so he would get out again. Now..... I was a hero at all the neighborhood get togethers. Everyone wanted to invite the Great White Hunter over for dinner!

Little did I know, dad had invited some neighbors over to the farm one day and low and behold here comes ARNOLD to investigate them. He musta figured they had a pocket full of corn or something. Dad said they took off running to their cars and couldnt figure out why they were so scared. Then they informed him that they thought I had killed that beast, at which time Dad asked why would he do that, hes our pet.

UUUH OOOOH, AAAAACE you got a lot of splaining to do! Now to make a long story shorter...... it looks like ARNOLD is slated for the COOKER! Figured I couldn't keep him holed up much longer anyway.

Maybe I'll use him as a LIVE decoy first, that would make for another adventure I'm sure. Dad said to put a BULLSEYE on his side and let him run around the farm for a while. Wouldnt that be funny? I think i'll do that and take a picture for you boys to see?!

[SeaBiscuit]

Great read Ace, very funny! The best stories are the real ones!
I can picture you and your considerable mass going after this baby piglet in the sticks and makes me smile!
I say do not kill Arnold, just keep us updated on the adventures.
Did he breed with any of the neighborhood pets?

SeaBiscuit

[Ace1st]

His ADVENTURES are what I'm afraid of, ARNOLD is now about 80 lbs with maybe a inch and a half TUSK.

He really thinks hes a dog! My lab and austrailian shepard think hes a dog too. Dad says I'm gonna have to float(GRIND) his TUSK if he gets any bigger though.

I'll keep you up to date on his status.

Pictures of ARNOLD forthcoming!

[Captain Michael Buffington]

He sounds like alot of fun. I would have a hard time shooting him. Maybe we could all chip in to build a pig proof pen...We could call it...."The Save Arnold Campaign". We need pics Ace, for the flyers and such.

Mike

[Ace1st]

It'll be tuff convincing Dad. Hes already talking about a new barbecue sauce he wants to try out.

PIG in a POKE SAUCE!! I knew I should have never named him. I just can't imagine him with an APPLE in his mouth!

I'll take some pictures of him this evening.

[SeaBiscuit]

SAVE ARNOLD

[beaglewoman]

Great I Love It. If every thing doesn't work out, let me know if there is anything I can do to help out arnold.

[Ace1st]

[SIZE="4"][COLOR="Red"]DISCLAIMER: Contained in this thread are images depicting actual animal behavior. The pictures contained here do not represent the opinions of the poster. Impact shots are visible!! WARNING WARNING....PIGGY PORKCHOP **** is contained is this thread. If these images offend....DO NOT GO FURTHER!! Visuals of BOSTON BUTTS and PORKCHOPS are evident!! Well Ya'll..........as promised I got some pictures of ARNOLD this morning.

Although I think with all the HOOPLAH thats been going on lately with the neighbors and him being holed up in his pen the last couple days, he's been wanting to release a little PENNED up energy that he was saving for the neighborhood POODLE.

So as I aproached his PIG PALACE he showed out a little from all the CITEMENT and decided to try to coerse "JEB", my Lab, into a little HIDE the PORKCHOP. "JEB" would have none of that and high tailed it for the gate!

Now this was not to deter ARNOLD, he simply rolled his PEPSI CRATE over and practiced a little MAKIN BACON with that instead. BOSTON BUTTS in the BUFF!!

I guess everyone needs a good PEPSI CRATE from time to time.

The ADVENTURES of ARNOLD continue!!

[beaglewoman]

LMTO.... that is some crazy chit. I love it...

What will arnold do next?



Also, we have been seeing plenty of hog signs while fishing, and at the farm. Most the land where we fish is Game Managment land, so hogs can be hunted there. Great place to run your bulldogs. Easy catch. Also good running for the coon dogs, lots of coon sign also. Anyone interested let me know.. My coon dogs are ready to go..

[beaglewoman]

Blackey was wondering if Arnold is still available....